Friday, December 15, 2017

Flashback Friday: Rebellion Phase #3 and Heartache

Dec 1987:
Story Thus Far:
I was on a downhill spiral of self-doubt and rebellion.  I'd questioned my own desirability as a potential mate; I was depressed at the thought of having to take another year of general studies; my weekend traveling and trying to flip-flop my schedule for 48 hours had me stressed out; I'd just decided I was NEVER going to be a part of my boyfriend's family, so why the hell did I continue to go see him every week?  I'd gone to a bar with friends from my summer job and discovered a man had been nearly beaten to death outside our window.  We hadn't even known it.

The start of the 2nd quarter had me pissed off.  First, because I hadn't passed my Math class, so not only had to retake it, but 099 as well.  I was also taking a speech class; fine, I could handle it.  I'd decided to delay signing up for any more of my major classes, in order to get those darn Gen Studies ones out of the way.

I did talk CS into taking me to the winter dance, and we ended up at the same table as my 1st college boyfriend, a 'what-the-hell-were-you-thinking' moment when I realized who he was!  Ugh...I'd dated him?  I pretended not to recognize him, and he apparently didn't recognize me!  Thankfully, we were at opposite ends of the table, and didn't interact.

My 1st speech landed on my birthday, so I threw myself a party and demonstrated how to bake a Stir-n-Frost birthday cake.  Later, CS met us at the Olive Garden on 38th St to celebrate my 22nd birthday.  Turned out he'd been dropped off, and my aunt and uncle, who didn't live too far from him, ended up taking him home.  So no 'alone' time with him.

I also had to report to the police station, to give my statement about what happened that night in the bar.  The detective tried to scare me, saying the guy had nearly died, and all I was doing was laughing with my friends and playing darts?

Yes; I didn't even pay attention to whom else was in the place!

We flew to Florida for Christmas, and Grandma got sick.  My sister and I borrowed her car and went shopping on the beach, purchasing bumper stickers "No Guts, No Glory' for me, and 'If It Swells, Ride It' for her.  I tried to tactfully get her to buy something else, but she didn't 'get' the connotation until we were back at Grandma's!  To this day, I have no idea whatever happened to those stickers; we'd also bought two twisty necklaces, and neither of them came home.  So they were either accidentally thrown away, or misplaced.

I'd taken my journal with me, to use as a guide while I continued to work on my 1st book, and made the mistake of leaving it out.  Mom found it, read it, and was none too happy about my 'private' activities.  She lectured; I sulked; I ended up saying whatever I could to get her off my case.  I was 22, not 12.  I never saw my journal again, and I was heartbroken.  Everything I'd written about JF and 1986 were gone forever, except what little I'd written in my tiny diary, along with my memories.  Later, I discovered Mom had placed it in a hiding place, but forgot to pack it, and Grandma found it.  She burned it.

My gifts that year included white sweatpants with 'Pepsi' down one leg, and a pair of furry bear claw slippers:)  I still have the bear feet; when one developed holes on the bottom, I stopped wearing them.  Can you tell I loved them?  I'd also gotten CS the Pink Floyd tape, Momentary Lapse of Reason, and copied most of it onto a blank cassette tape.  Still love the songs "Comfortably Nunb", "On The Turning Away", and "Learning To Fly".

Next Month:  Rebellion, Phase #4:  Driving Violation

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Present Day:
Last night, we drove to Terre Haute to meet my parents for dinner at the Olive Garden, to celebrate mine and Kyle's birthdays.  Mom got me a Star Wars figure, some slippers, a pair of Christmas earrings, and an entire box of printer paper.  Kyle got some T-shirts.

Later, D and I went to Best Buy, and he bought me a new laptop, an ASUS.  Windows 10, Intel processor.

I've also managed to lose my voice, so no karaoke last night.  I have to get it back for tomorrow; choir is singing, then we're going to see Star Wars, plus I was planning to stay out late at karaoke, to celebrate my birthday!  I'm living on cough drops, Delsym, and kleenex!

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